Wearing Nike running shorts and Uggs at the same time is not logical. Nor is it cute, attractive, or in any way, shape, or form sexy. If you find yourself in that particular ensemble, topped with a pastel-colored tee-shirt that is a size and a half too small, you could be one of two things: severely confused as to the weather, or, a sorority girl on any given college campus across the country. Or both, now that I think of it.
And if you insist on wearing Uggs on a day where the sun is shining and blazing hot in freaking OKLAHOMA, at the very least, pick up your feet when you walk. I'm not demanding a high-step march, but the band geek in me wants to smack you as you shuffle down the Oval, chatting on your pink bedazzled iPhone about that totally cute guy from the party who you can't quite remember because you got a lot drunker than you promised yourself you would get.
Yes, I can hear your conversations. And they're not very interesting.
Heart, me.
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